Thursday, December 6, 2007

A primer on Mormonism and Sacred Undies


King James Bible”And if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life, and out of the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.”

What that means is nobody can tack on an addendum to the bible like kook Joseph Smith, Jr., did in March 1830.

Here are some brief lowlights of what these weird white people believe.

1. The Book of Mormon contains detailed accounts of the lives of peoples that reportedly traveled from the Middle East and settled in the Americas around 600 BC
There were pre-Columbian peoples that were white, literate, had knowledge of Old World languages, and possessed Old World derived writing systems.

2. They didn’t admit blacks until 1978. Brigham Young who said "You must not think, from what I say, that I am opposed to slavery. No! The negro is damned, and is to serve his master till God chooses to remove the curse of Ham...".[102] Those critics also illustrate church racism by quoting sections of the Book of Mormon which describe dark skin as a sign of a curse and a mark from God to distinguish a more righteous group of people from a less righteous group, and by citing passages describing white skin as "delightsome" while dark skin is portrayed as un-enticing.

3. I won’t even get into the polygamy.
4. Holocaust survivors and other Jewish groups have criticized the church twice, in 1995 and again in 2002, for performing unauthorized proxy baptisms of Jewish Holocaust victims.

5. Founder, Joseph Smith married at least 32 women during his lifetime, including several under the age of 16.

6. They wear secret underwear to keep them chaste. See image above.

The last thing we need at this point on the game is some Cultist like Mitt Romney running the country in Top Secret Underoo's!!!
If you have these foolish, racist, sexist , homophobic beliefs then you are not fit to run a "reality based" country.

Monday, December 3, 2007

Pre-empting an adultering -fornicator




Rudy left his cancer having wife for his communications director. This guy is a total sleaze with a total of count 3, yes three marriages. After wagging their finger at the left for moral shortcomings for decades, this writer wonders how the "Value Voters" aka Christain bigots can bring themselves to pull the handle for this louse. He cheated on both of his wives and I'm guessing would lie to the country too!






Friday, November 30, 2007

Where's Turtle and Drama?

Say what you want about the man but his posse' is deep bitches!

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

I prayed for Snow and got it!

Awhile back I used to dislike Tony snow. A paid propagandist on Fox News and where ever else Rove wanted him.
I recall wishing, nay, praying after he took the press sec. job that he would get cancer and die a painful death leaving his kids orphaned. I know that seems cruel, but none of my other prayers ever came true, so I just threw this one up there.
Lo' and behold, on my birthday no less.... On September 19th, it was reported in the AP that a cancerous growth was found inside his brain. Though Snow has been reluctant to describe himself as terminally ill, on September 27 he admitted to Jay Leno on the Tonight Show that he will have cancer for the rest of his life, "unless and until they find a cure."
Typical spin: "unless and until they find a cure."
What an asshole.
Thank You Jesus for coming through on this one.

CHICKEN/PORK ADOBO FILIPINO DISH

Thought I'd drop a little Asian recipe just so you'd know I'm not a racist behind that China entry below.
I had this last night with pork.
It was spectacular.

1 spring chicken cut in serving sizes
1/2 c. soy sauce (low salt)
1/3 c. vinegar1 head fresh garlic
8 to 10 pepper corn
1 sm. bay leaf
1/2 to 1 tsp. salt according to taste
1/3 c. sherry, optional
Mix all ingredients by hand in a pot.
cook slowly for 8 hours.
Do not stir.
Serve hot with rice or shred it up for sandwiches.
The clash between the sweet mayo on the sandwich and the spicy in the meat will hit your mouth like Imelda's shoes!

If you can't make in Des Moines you can't make it anywhere

Why is it that the small clan of voters in some crappy flyover state (Go Hawkeyes!) get to choose who the other 98% of us can vote for in 08'?


If a candidate is too radical for the 2,982,085, corn-pohn in Iowa, then they will lose the following primaries and never get to run. We need to do away with a primary system that forces all of our candidates to pass mustard with the most traditional and retrograde among us before they can even be voted for on a nation-wide election by the other 224,548,863 eligible voters like me and you!

Americans Suffer the Apathy of Fu Man Chu!!



Ever have a rough afternoon at work? Bad traffic jam on the way in got you down? Spilled your Starbucks on your shirt in the lobby? Ever have one of those Friday afternoon's where you just didn't want to be at work?

Did you work suffer at this time? Did you feel a little apathetic about the quality of your product?

Well imagine if you lived in Communist China, under an authoritarian, communist, and socialist, with heavy restrictions remaining in many areas, most notably in the Internet and in the press, freedom of assembly, freedom of reproductive rights, and freedom of religion. Imagine if you were 10 years old and lived well below the US poverty line. Do you think you would really care about what some American that you will never meet that lives 6000 miles away feeds to his dog???

China's food- and drug-safety record has come under scrutiny in recent months following the deaths of cats and dogs in the United States and Canada blamed on tainted Chinese pet food ingredients. Since then, U.S. inspectors have banned or turned away a growing number of Chinese exports - from monkfish to juice to toothpaste - because they contained life-threatening levels of toxins or unsafe chemicals.

If you pay slaves slave wages you shouldn't be surprised when you get a shitty product unloaded at your local dock!

Boycott China Already!

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Playing Footsies in the shitter

Yet again another "Family Values" candidate has been arrested for trying to blow a cop...

Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) has pleaded guilty to misdemeanor disorderly conduct. The charges are connected to a lewd conduct investigation at the Minneapolis-St. Paul airport in June. A plainclothes police officer took Craig into custody after investigating complaints of sexual activity in the men's restroom. The officer's report says the senator did several things that could be interpreted as an invitation for lewd conduct.

I knew that they were the Law & Order party but damn!

Here's another one:
"Representative Bob Allen, a Republican in the Florida House of Representatives, blamed the weather and his fear of black men for offering $20 to perform oral sex on a man in a public park. The man turned out to be an undercover police officer, who promptly arrested Allen. "

In March, he co-sponsored an unsuccessful bill that would have enhanced penalties for "offenses involving unnatural and lascivious acts" such as indecent exposure.

Now I'm not a CPA, but from what I heard you get paid to SUCK a cock. You're not supposed to pay and have to suck a cock.

No wonder we're running a deficit!!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Back to work for Bill Maher, Bush and I.

New Bill Maher tomorrow on HBO
He may not be good looking but he has one of the best opinions on government out in MSM.

Looks like vacation is winding down for everybody.
Put those Croc's away and grab your loafers...


Saturday, August 18, 2007

The Battle for Oil...On Ice

Canada will soon have a third coastline due to global climate change. The ice in and around the Northwest Passage is melting.


There is now a race between Russia, Denmark, and Canada to claim the Pole that is, wait for the money shot....



"estimated to contain up to 10 billion tons of oil and gas deposits, as well as vast reserves of diamonds and valuable metals such as gold, tin and platinum. "--Livescience.com

http://www.livescience.com/environment/070801_russia_npole.html





This stuff was under ice before, so it's a new ocean basically, and countries are grabbing for it:




BBC NEWS Europe Russia plants flag under N Pole




Danes pipe up with their own North Pole claims




NPR: Russia Tries to Claim North Pole, Canada Says No Way




I won't even bother to point out the absurdity of the global warming allowing for us to drill for more oil.



What this post is about, is "a potential border conflict for a huge prize on the top of the world."
I thought this was a plot from a GI Joe comic when I was a little kid. So, I googled it and FOUND the comic book!




Here's that issues summary:





"When Cobra’s illegal oil harvest activities threaten global economy and environmental stability, the GI JOE team is called in to get them out! Snow Job, Iceberg, and Frostbite team up with Scarlett, Snake-Eyes, Stalker, and Duke to deal with squads of arctic enemies in the most inhospitable location on earth!"


When dependence on oil causes "western democracies" to reenact comic book plots from the 80's, Congress needs to start funding research for solar power, large transit projects, electric cars, biking and growing food locally.



Seriously.


Or prepare to live under the heavy fist of Cobra!

Guns and Progressives

Everyone should arm themselves.

Besides the possibility of a zombie coup, it’s a good idea to be at least as well armed as the people that hate you.

Moderates and liberals tend to vilify all firearms, but look at this asshole:


Now really, do you want him determining where or if you can vote? He doesn't look to open to gay rights. Where does he stand on interracial marriage even?

Heaven forbid we ever devolve into a civil war, or recession fueled crime wave, but those in countries where this has happened are glad that they had a few lying around when the time came. This lady here has the right idea. Sisters are doing it for themselves:


This guy is all casual with his at this point:


My point is that when all the other factions in a future global conflict are armed; do you want to be the only one who isn’t?

Here is our sweet liberal friend from Seattle showing guns can be useful and stylish accesories...


They may even determine what your rights are in an uncertain future.

Thanks Cheryl!!

Carnitas


Pork Shoulder. Pick the one that barely fits.

Drop in pork.

2- Jalapeno peppers. Fresh ones are much hotter. Use 4 if you’re using canned ones and maybe some of those carrots.

1 or 2-Tomato and Peppers in a can. They're like .79 and in the same aisle as the tomato paste. Two cans if you have a huge crockpot/pork shoulder.


Remove from pot. Salt to taste.

I found that two whole days on low is the best.

It’s great in 8 hours on high, but one time I brought home a pizza and we let the pig simmer overnight on low and woke to the smell of the Pinnacle of Pork.

--------------------

I usually stop here, but...


Now you can go the extra mile and lightly fry the meat, but that will make you impotent and dependent on Plavix.

This is fattening as it is addictive. You were warned.



People of Faith


From the great wiki:
Crockpot
A slow cooker (often referred to as a Crock-Pot, though this is registered trademark for specific manufacturer's type of slow cooker) is a countertop electrical home appliance that is used to cook stews and other dishes containing water at relatively low temperatures, with correspondingly long cooking times (several hours). Many recipes simply call for the ingredients to be put in the cooker with little preparation. The slow cooker can then safely be left to run unattended, making it a convenient cooking method.

Rage
Rage is the accumulation of unexpressed anger and perceived disrespectful transactions that after multiple "stuffings" finally glows to the surface. The thought that someone is deliberately inciting anger and the feeling to get even, that trying to be reasonable has proven ineffective

Dig that last line!
CPOR

Hillary is the devil




Rupert has endorsed her.
Moderates and progressive beware! She is more of the same crooked crony capitalism in culottes. The only upside to her winning is good SNL skits, and maybe Bill as Sect. Of State.

Besides I can’t respect her because she didn’t have the balls to leave her philandering husband.

If I got a BJ from an intern, my wife/fiancĂ©e’ would leave/sue/divorce me and I would be eating ramen in some shitty apartment with three illegal alien roomies. That didn’t happen here because she is a power hungry harpy. If she can't call bullshit on her fat hubby, how is she going to stare down Putin or Iran?





Verde Chicken

1-Large can of green enchilada sauce.
5lbs.- Chicken, for the rich boneless breast, for the poor boneless thighs.
Dump in the chicken.
Dump in the sauce.
Throw away can, because it’s sharp and gross.
Turn it on high before you leave for work.
8 hours later tasty green poultry goodness.
Drain off 80% of the juice, and salt to taste.

My blog-ginity

Today I lose my blog-ginity with my first post. What you’ll find here is a strong cup of outrage and a warm pot of food. I am an angry 32 year old that has a love for country and crock-pots. I’ll try to include a recipe with every other post, but on a daily basis my outrage is kicking my culinary creativity in the groin, so you’re in for more venom than vittles. Every recipe you’ll see how been tried out and I’ll only be passing along the gold.

Enjoy,
CPOR